It was a real nice weekend and I went outside to shoot some pictures. Along the way I came across a “Hospado” that’s a place to buy beer and no food. Although they might have some pickled cheese or sausages. Although I ain’t seen no pickled pig’s feet nor eggs much, I have seen some pickled eel wrapped up in onion.
Anyway,! I was sitting there and squinting from the sun and writing things to think about, things to do, and things to think about doing. The spring sun was just right and the pivo was no more than a mortal has a right to expect in this world. I was just about in my own private Heaven. The birds was a twittering and flowers was hanging from the trees and things was what you hope for and when you get it you appreaciate it. Until, that is, until this yammering idiot sat down next to me. How did he know I wasn’t czech? How did he know to speak English and inflict me with his whateverthehellyoucallitwouldntshutupaboutandmusthavebeenimportantbutillbedamnedificared.
Well, I tried to ignore him and pretend I didn’t understand because I just lived here, but he kept on. This yahoo kept on and bought me a beer so I left my own private paradise in the leaves and sunlight and thudded down to my chair.
Maybe this feller seen my scowl and thunk it was a frown and I was in need of consoling. Well, I was in need of consoling for one of them moments you remember for ages had been cut short. So the feller says, “Tis better to be an optimist and proved wrong than a pessimist and proved right.”
Well, at first I wasn’t sure what he was getting at. There’s just too many denominations to keep track of these days. I just sort of looked at him and said I didn’t reckon I was too interested as I was a Baptist and that was enough for me. I reckon God will sort out the pessimists, optimists, and the Espispicalions like he sees fit.
So then the feller puts his glass of pivo in front of me. Here’s what happened next!:
Feller: Look, is this glass half full or half
Empty?
Me: Well, that depends. Is it mine or is it yours?
Feller: It doesn’t matter! It’s just a beer!
Me: Just a beer?! If you’re talking like that!, it ain’t yours. So is it mine or somebody else’s?
Feller: Who cares! It isn’t important.
Me: I see. And you’re right. It ain’t important. A beer that ain’t mine ain’t important enough to discuss.! ;! Be back in a minute.
( A few minutes later. ;! )
Feller: Ok, It’s your beer on the table.
Me: So, why do I have a beer on the table? Did it appear before I ordered it, or am I coming back from watering the trees, or has it been here all along?
Feller: Whatever!,!.!
Me: Well, your the one making the fuss. Ok, it’s my beer. Is it half full or half empty? It depends. If I have had a gulp or two, it’s half empty. If the waitress brings it to me like this, it’s half full.
Feller: So an optimist sees it half full and a pessimist half empty! Why are you a pessimst?
Me: So, you’re saying that a good day is run of the mill, and a bad day is special? I say a bad day is run of the mill and a good day is something special. I like my special days to be good ones. Now about the beer. It seems to me an optimist is going to die of thrist waiting for that half full beer to finish getting full, while I am going to enjoy helping this half empty beer accomplish it’s goal.
© 2008 April 13 2008
(No shit!)
Anyway,! I was sitting there and squinting from the sun and writing things to think about, things to do, and things to think about doing. The spring sun was just right and the pivo was no more than a mortal has a right to expect in this world. I was just about in my own private Heaven. The birds was a twittering and flowers was hanging from the trees and things was what you hope for and when you get it you appreaciate it. Until, that is, until this yammering idiot sat down next to me. How did he know I wasn’t czech? How did he know to speak English and inflict me with his whateverthehellyoucallitwouldntshutupaboutandmusthavebeenimportantbutillbedamnedificared.
Well, I tried to ignore him and pretend I didn’t understand because I just lived here, but he kept on. This yahoo kept on and bought me a beer so I left my own private paradise in the leaves and sunlight and thudded down to my chair.
Maybe this feller seen my scowl and thunk it was a frown and I was in need of consoling. Well, I was in need of consoling for one of them moments you remember for ages had been cut short. So the feller says, “Tis better to be an optimist and proved wrong than a pessimist and proved right.”
Well, at first I wasn’t sure what he was getting at. There’s just too many denominations to keep track of these days. I just sort of looked at him and said I didn’t reckon I was too interested as I was a Baptist and that was enough for me. I reckon God will sort out the pessimists, optimists, and the Espispicalions like he sees fit.
So then the feller puts his glass of pivo in front of me. Here’s what happened next!:
Feller: Look, is this glass half full or half
Empty?
Me: Well, that depends. Is it mine or is it yours?
Feller: It doesn’t matter! It’s just a beer!
Me: Just a beer?! If you’re talking like that!, it ain’t yours. So is it mine or somebody else’s?
Feller: Who cares! It isn’t important.
Me: I see. And you’re right. It ain’t important. A beer that ain’t mine ain’t important enough to discuss.! ;! Be back in a minute.
( A few minutes later. ;! )
Feller: Ok, It’s your beer on the table.
Me: So, why do I have a beer on the table? Did it appear before I ordered it, or am I coming back from watering the trees, or has it been here all along?
Feller: Whatever!,!.!
Me: Well, your the one making the fuss. Ok, it’s my beer. Is it half full or half empty? It depends. If I have had a gulp or two, it’s half empty. If the waitress brings it to me like this, it’s half full.
Feller: So an optimist sees it half full and a pessimist half empty! Why are you a pessimst?
Me: So, you’re saying that a good day is run of the mill, and a bad day is special? I say a bad day is run of the mill and a good day is something special. I like my special days to be good ones. Now about the beer. It seems to me an optimist is going to die of thrist waiting for that half full beer to finish getting full, while I am going to enjoy helping this half empty beer accomplish it’s goal.
© 2008 April 13 2008
(No shit!)
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